My spirit guide tells me who to hire and who to fire

April 13, 2018

 

Are we wasting our time with traditional assessment methods?

 

Award-winning recruitment blog Tutti Recruitti caught up with Global HR Director Augusta Netchurch, and learnt about her innovative approach to talent management.

 

Here's what she had to say:

 

"It's really very simple, and I'm suprised more aren't following my proven approach

 

People like me - those who are able to communicate with the spirit world - are able to call on advisors from other dimensions to guide them through difficult people decisions 

 

My spirit guide is PT Barnum, famed for being 'The Greatest Showman on Earth', who sadly departed the material world in 1891

 

I can't ask for a better advisor than the man who was responsible for hiring Myrtle Corbin, The Four-

 

Legged Girl, or Chang Yu Sing, The Chinese Giant - this guy really knows talent when he sees (or senses) it

 

Once I'd convinced our CEO of my special abilities - during our regular office séance - and we'd discovered that he too had a spirit guide (American lacrosse player Charles E. Marsters), it was an easy decision to take away all hiring and firing decisions from our managers

 

The benefits to our hiring and performance management processes are huge

 

We've no need to interview people, we just ask PT - and instead of annual reviews, we consult with Charles E. Marsters who communicates who we should fire by spelling out their names on the CEO's ouija board"

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