300 staff released after Boss get’s wrong end of the stick

Nothing comes as a surprise these days, but when sports apparel company owner, Sharon Horlick found herself the butt of a joke, nobody expected the outrage that followed.

To find out more about the wild story, Tutti Recruitti, “Top 10 Factual News Outlet” winner 2018, sent in its crack team of investigators to find out what had really got Sharon’s berries in a twist.

“I’m up for a laugh and a joke as much as the next person”, Sharon made clear upon the team’s arrival at her home.

“I love them all, the ruder and more offensive the better!”

“But if you take the p*ss out of my shaved head, that’s it! Get ready!” she yelled aggressively, whilst banging her hand down on the pork pie to her right.

As a modern, forward-thinking employer, Tutti Recruitti encompasses everything that equality and diversity should be about. So things got a little heated when the team suggested that there was a hint of hypocrisy in what she was saying.

“I’m not bothered!” she stated

“They went too far so I sacked them all and literally took my balls home. All 3,214 of them from the warehouse out back.”

“I make a point at interview that we’re a fair and ethical employer, but that we expect the same back.”

“Now, I may have made the odd joke about our summer intern’s accent, and joined in the banter about Paul the Pastafarian, and probably a lot of other stuff too, but that does not give anyone the right to have a dig at me because I enjoy the way a bald head feels in a cool breeze.”

“They were all laughing uncontrollably, so I told them I was shutting the site and going to run it from home again.”

“And that if they wanted a reference from me, they could kiss my shiny napper!”

The interview went on for a while longer, but essentially drifted from the situation with her business and led to the Tutti Recruitti team perusing her sports equipment and having a game of rounders.

Ultimately, Sharon wasn’t a bad egg, and probably should have let it slide. Her staff were having a bit of a laugh and a joke, which all started when they were messing about with one of their other bald colleagues, and she took it seriously. Is this kind of situation inevitable when you have a workplace that encourages fun and laughter? Should a workplace be kept strictly professional? Or is there a balance to be found somewhere in the middle?

Who knows.

Brought to you by Tutti Recruitti, super-deadly-serious journalism since 2018