50 Shades of Sheila - The Sheila Diaries - Day 1

July 23, 2018

 

 

Very slowly, I placed the girthy tip in my mouth and sucked it

 

That pen lid was full of memories. I could still taste the egg I ate on my final day

 

Returning here was akin to taking back a cheating husband. He can't change his spots, but you can't help admiring them. The spots have become part of the wallpaper of my life, and I can't afford to redecorate

 

99% of the office voted for me to be ousted. Not one of my 99 colleagues had my back, only I prevented a clean sweep

 

After a lengthy court battle I am back. Judge Rinder's authoritative ruling ensures Jester Sheila is no more. No more 'hide Sheila and don't seek her', no more 'pin the tassels on Sheila' and no more 'hungry hippo Sheila'

 

I have changed but the atmosphere may have not. The blank card that welcomed me this morning is a sign of disdain

 

I will do whatever it takes to win over this office. I'm not going to sit back in this broom closet like a dirty mop.  I'm going to be the 'as seen on TV' JML Whizz Microfiber Mop I know I can be

 

I used to be a stain, but I will become stain remover

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